XXIII Thermidor CCXXVI
As the program draws to a conclusion, the contrast betwixt the initial entrance and final days becomes quite clear in the subject of both our comprehension of the Russian language as well as the social and emotional connections which were established during the duration of the trip. This contrast displays a positive correlation of the content of these subjects with time. From this development, I predict, will come great influence upon the behavior of each of us in the future. This in conjunction with our reactions to these influences on our behavior will lead to a synthesized end-product that we can call progress.
However, we should remain wary of the prospect of exaggerated emotional attachment which may lead to sentimentalism or even ghastly lamentation in the future. Attachment to memories is weakness and memories should serve the purpose of (amongst other things) entrenching anticipated behavioral improvements. We must resist the temptation to become nostalgic with our mental discipline—our iron will, iron hearts, souls of stone, and minds of steel.
Certainly, all are not afflicted by such sentimentality and express enthusiasm at returning. For them my concern lies not with the immediate future but with the long-term. Still there are those about whom even this cannot be said, for whom the shock of dramatic change will be the primary source of dissatisfaction. But for both groups I maintain that the most healthy practice is to keep upfront the instrumentality of emotional mental states with respect to memories of events. And of those who are not afflicted at all, then I have no consultation for there is no illness to treat.
In any case, the synthesized state of progress will inevitably follow from our experiences, and so, with or without suffering as a consequence of sentimentality, there will be an advancement of personal behavioral dispositions overall.
I would like to express my utmost gratitude to the administrators, instructors, and peers of this program. Whilst I would not classify myself as superstitious, I must say that approximately two to three weeks prior to arriving in Tallinn for this program, I had several dreams in which I had missed my flight or some other misfortunes had occurred. I am glad to see that my intuition regarding the inconsistency of bad omens in predicting potential misfortunes has been vindicated, for there have been no problems, no missed flights or other misfortunes—only bliss and Dionysian intoxication at the condition of existence.